For one Parisien mother of four, the options for herself and her family in the years to come were already clear. She spends much of her time organising and planning ahead to secure a smooth future for herself and her family. But what about the present? What about today? If today's future will one day be our present, do we have room to appreciate what we have already worked hard to achieve? For our efficient, hard-working and clutter free Parisien mother, this was a powerful realisation, as she came to terms with the challenge of 'being in the moment' to appreciate the present. Planning for the future doubtless has its rewards. In this instance though, the price being paid suddenly apeared to be too high and what was left was an appreciation of the present.

'The past is history, the future is a mystery and
today is a gift which is why its called the present'

At lunchtime, we gathered in the marquee to hear our Parisien mum 'Sing for Fun' with a group from another course, which she had also attended during the week. Her beaming smile was evident. She was 'in the moment' singing for her life and all it had bought her.

On my return home from Marlborough, I wasn't sure what to expect, having left my husband in the care of our two children for the week. As I walked in, I heard the cricket on the radio and then saw the three of them making apple pie. Our eldest son was rolling out the pastry while the youngest sorted the 'goodies' from the 'baddies' amongst the apples, cores and peelings, picked earlier from the garden. For once I was thankful that my husband lives in the present, even if it does mean I have to organise everything beyond lunchtime on any given day. I don't know who won the cricket but the apple pie was delicious.

Riding as a professional jockey for 7 years, taught me a lot about dismounting horses which were effectively 'dead'. They didn't win, they were never going to win and they certainly weren't going to enhance the career of any jockey. Where expectation of a racehorse's potential is high, perseverance often overcomes common sense as trainers of 'dead' horses continue to find 'bad enough' races in which they may be sighted. As it costs just as much to train a bad horse as it does a good horse, little is achieved until a decision is taken to retire these horses and re-train them for another, more suitable role.

In her book

Ladies........If Your Horse is Dead - DISMOUNT!
Lyn McDonald uses this analogy to tell the stories of women who recognise their 'dead horses' (their own self limiting beliefs) and who find the courage to discover a 'thoroughbred' to take them in the direction they really want to go. A dead horse is not our dead-end relationship or our dead-end job but a mindset we need to let go of in order to grow and prosper.

So why are we so reluctant to dismount our dead horses? We cling onto what we know because its comfortable, even though its not what we want. 'Better the devil we know'. This is the most common reason for sitting on a dead horse.